Well, I was drunk the day my mom got out of prison. And I went to pick her up in the rain. But before I could get to the station in my pick up truck, She got ran over by a damned old train
David Allen Coe
Heyyy mann!! If this bird goes down, this is the safest place to be!! Right in the tail, where the bathroom is!! You’ll see! And I’m gonna stay in here, on the whoooooole flight!! I’m gonna be here, and I’m gonna be safe… as can beeeeeee!!
Krist Noveselic video taping himself in a bathroom on a plane to Europe with Nirvana
When Charlie Sheen says tigers blood, I think of the snow cone flavor. His erratic behavior is caused by being hyped up on sugar! =) aaahh i dare to dream. He’s still one of my fav actors, and I do hope he stays clean and calms down and find his happiness.
Cell Phone found in Charles Manson’s cell
I thought this news article was hilarious!
Posted on December 13, 2010 Posted by P. Beckert
Authorities at Corcoran State Prison in Corcoran, California recently found a cell phone under inmate Charles Manson’s pillow. When confronted, Manson claimed that he didn’t even know what the hell the thing was and said someone must have planted it there. “Hey, man,” I’m a child from the 60’s, man. What the hell would I know about some piece of shit from the 90’s or whatever the hell decade we’re in, man?” shouted Manson as he grabbed a gnat from the air and ate it. However, later at dinner, Manson was overheard telling another inmate that he has finally found a way to communicate with his master, Satan. “Yeah, man, someone passed me this little square thing and said it was a cell phone and told me I could call people on it. I opened it and looked at it, but it didn’t do anything, so I figured I’d have to go back to my cell before it would work,” Manson related to the lifer known only as Mac, who’d been in Corcoran since 1937, and didn’t even really know how a regular telephone worked. “When I got back to my cell, I started punching a bunch of sixes into the thing, you know, like 666 and stuff and then I heard some guy yelling ‘hello, hello.’ Jesus Christ,” said Manson, “it sounded just like Satan, so I got on there and started chatting with him, you know, like asking him how many people he killed today and mostly just bullshitting with him about Satany stuff, but mostly he just kept saying “who is this? Are you crazy? And when I told him ‘it’s me, Manson, man,’ he just laughed and said ‘sure, Manson,’ but he didn’t sound like he believed me, so I told him I was gonna cut off his head and shit down his neck and then he hung up on me man.” Manson claims that Satan sounds just like a regular guy, “like a plumber or something, not nothing like the leader of the underworld, man. What a fu*king downer. All these years I’ve been telling people Satan is my master, and it turns out Satan is just another bullshit nobody man.”
Friends & Family keep asking me “how is the bf doing” or “who is your bf in your profile pic?” umm what bf?? Well apparently from this pic of Mr. Kevin Devine and I at a show, people think I’m dating him! Lmao! Which for me is flattering cuz K-Dev is hot and talented and of course I’d love to date him. But its probably un-flattering for him!! Lol sorry Kevin!! Tho thanks for this awesome pic that everyone questions!!
Best of Craig’s List - Austin -
best of craigslist > austin > Mom, I know you’re there. Originally Posted: Tue, 11 Mar 16:38 CDT
Mom, I know you’re there.
Date: 2008-03-11, 4:38PM CDT
Mom, I know you’re out there, reading this.
How do I know you’re out there?
Let’s begin with that ad of mine that you recently responded to, shall we? You know the one I’m talking about. It was entitled, “Mrs. Robinson, are you trying to seduce me? m4w—22” That ad ran for three days before I got a response, and I can’t tell you, Mom, how my heart fell when I saw the photo that accompanied the response. It was your Realtor’s head-shot, the one on your business card. Even worse was the text of your response. I’m so, so sorry I know now what you�d do to me if we ever “hooked up.” On the other hand, Dad must’ve been a very, very lucky guy back in the day. I dunno, maybe he still is.
I guess, Mom, when I think a bit about it, that I should resign myself to whatever it is that you are doing. After all, you’re an adult and I’m an adult. I can’t tell you what you should do with your life.
But Mom, I’d like to raise a few points.
The first point I’d like to raise is that you’re still married to Dad. Please, please PLEASE tell me that you have his blessing. My mind is reeling now, hoping that you’re not the people who posted “Fun Couple Looking For Others-MW4MW-57” I have a sneaking suspicion, though, that it is you. Now that I know you’re cruising CE, I suspect that there aren’t too many other 57 year old swingers from the Westlake area posting on Craigslist.
The second point I’d like to raise is that you owe it to whoever you’re trying to hook up with to be honest. I mean, I lived with you and Dad for 18 years. You’re not that fun.
Finally, I’d like you to stop responding to my “College Stud Needs a MILF-m4w-22” ads. The only one who should find you to be MILF-y at all is Dad. For me, you are just an �M�. Got it?
Your son.
PS. I’m going to swing by at around 7-7:30-ish to do a load of wash, is that okay? I tried to call you at the office, but they kept telling me that you’re busy.
- Location: Austin
- it’s NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
PostingID: 603080295
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the actual website: http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/aus/603080295.html
Fluffee Talks - Cutting off your own head
Fluffee Talks - Teaching a Life Lesson
Fluffee Talks - Drugs Save a Trolls Life
Funny tweets from people I follow
Brian Bonz:
Damon Wayans Jr. :
